Being a Bachelor (1)
The simple truth
Freedom is not free
One of the many phases of my life that I have anticipated so badly, is this phase, FREEDOM (I’ve had my own fair share since undergrad, but this time is different). I am not sure if it is the freedom or the side attractions that comes with it.
Things like having my space, girls visiting (oh yeah, used to be a big deal), meet my stuff at the exact spot I kept them and all that random stuff an average young man ever wished for.
You know every guy wants to leave the house so bad like there’s a spirit chasing them. I wanted to leave years ago, especially that time I thought my Dad hated me because French and Maths was my biggest challenge. Sadly, I never impressed him for once.
We all crave a certain level of freedom, there is subtle respect that’s added to you when people hear, “oh, he stays alone”, “he has a job” and if you have a car, then it is finished. I recently heard having a car is on the bucket list of some ladies, “I can’t date a guy without a car oo” well, maybe they have a point there, especially in this period, you can’t be jumping buses while taking your Babe out in this Coro period.
For the few months of entering this thing, I dare say Bachelorhood is a trap, set to massage your ego while you die in loneliness claiming to be a man, there are exceptions to this, of course, that is if you already have a significant level of self-awareness, if not, the freedom you seek is just the beginning of an unending catastrophe.
Truthfully, our false perceptions of this reality make life seemingly difficult. The truth of the matter is you are never free, if you are free from parenting by space, you are deeply connected by sending money. In fact that time, they don’t understand with you again, that respect you want, you’ll get plenty of it from your parents with demands and more demands especially when you are from a very humble background, your savings will be affected, if you have a Lady you call Babe, then more spending for you.
Bachelors always want to prove a point, “I can take care of you” or “Money no be problem”, for some of us we go home to calculate how to cover up by not buying shirt or shoes for that whole month. We must prove a point, then you plan to be humble the following month, but as always, your ego keeps screaming spend this money — YOLO (You Only Live Once).
Having your space is good, countless moments of peace, at least nobody asks you to go hang your cloths or wash the noodles pot in your sink after 3 days. The room is as scattered as you want it and as arranged as your Babe does it (if you have). Sometimes, you just throw your clothes around to prove a point to yourself that yeah, “na me get my space”, silly mehn.
If you ever anticipate this phase just because of freedom, please have a rethink, let responsibility be ultimate to you. Get enough to set yourself up properly while staying with your parents, if you have the option. Don’t rush into freedom only to bound yourself from freedom.
There are too many baggages here to make you cry at night and guess what? You will cry with echoes of freedom watching the tough man shirtless while weeping at the middle of the night.
What is your simple truth on freedom?
